I Wish Everyone Was Still Here

by Ghosts Of Mercury

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about

A labor of love and hate

credits

released October 20, 2014

Shouts out to the memebers of tripkids media collective and the south florida music scene for keeping me on this Earth for the past year and a half. Without you guys, I wouldn't be here.

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Ghosts Of Mercury Florida

endless abyss of self indulgence

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Track Name: Kitten, You're No Ramona Flowers
You’re just as fucking bad as the first one
A brand new package, special and wrapped up
Manipulation takes hold of your cold reins
And brings me nothing but a world of pain

You’re a toxic lover, and a toxic friend
A shitty speaker with a shitty end
To a painful time in my short life
When I didn’t think that you should drop and die

So y’know that old saying,
that “you are what you eat”?
Well you can eat shit
because it’s all you’ll ever be.

And don’t say that you fucking miss me
Now that I’ve tossed you out of my life
Another eX crossed off the list
Of people I’ll never speak to again
Track Name: October 19th, 2012
There was major risk
In one short kiss
That I felt that homecoming night
But even though
You had seeds to sow
It all felt so right
But when I fell apart
You felt the need to start
Fucking with it even more
What’s the use in that?
I just loathed and sat
Wondering what this was all for.
I’m not your punching bag
Or your tear soaked diary
That you use to document the shit
That you’ve already done to me
Go find another job
Be someone else’s issue
I want you out of my mind
Because I just want to feel new
And alright
I’m over this
Forever
Track Name: Sabrina Can Bite Me (Pathetic)
Youre as pathetic as my love life
Youre as pathetic as my social lfe
Youre as pathetic as my entire fucking life

I saw you for six months
But after a while i was getting a hunch
That you didnt care about me and I was wasting my time
But i depended on you to make my day bright
But i was unaware that your pocket’s where you had me
Weighting on every need-your hands and your feet
Wondering when I’d feel the love and care
That youre supposed to fucking show to let me know its there
But it never showed up and you kicked me to the curb

THIS WAS A FUCKIN MISTAKE!

And your words cut my skin so many different times
And i was stuck in a hole of which i couldn’t climb
But after a while it made sense to me
Youre a stupid fucking cunt without any sympathy
All I did was have emotions and somehow that makes it
Fine to cause wounds that won’t heal and just quit
I could’ve fucking died and bled all over my room
And I stayed inside while my depression loomed

I WISH NOTHING BUT THE ABSOLUTE WORST FOR YOU!

You keep harassing my loved ones
You make up shit about me and try to ruin things for me
And you tell all my best friends i don’t give a fuck about them
I’m sorry i think you’re likely confused
The one who doesn’t even fucking care is you
And though ive moved on you refuse to behave
You think i should die and I never forgave

Why should I? You only ate at my spirit
And I know you’ll never even fucking hear this:
I can do better than you
You stupid
Sociopathic
Idiotic
Abusive
Cowering
Poisonous
Mindless
Bitch

I’M FUCKING BITTER!

Youre as pathetic as your love life
Youre as pathetic as your social life
Youre as pathetic as your actions
Youre as pathetic as your thoughts
Youre as pathetic as this song
Youre as pathetic as your entire fucking life
Track Name: Little, Mean Monsters
All i see are monsters
All i have is troubles
All i ever want is happiness
Or what little i can pick from the rubble

All i see is ghosts
Burned bridges, Lost tomes
All i see is lies
Dying foundations, Broken homes

A way to ground myself here
All I want is something to call my own
But everybody’s gone
It’s my fault, I’m all alone
Track Name: Pierced
You’re never around when I need you
Always bailing and leaving me in the dust
I’m a breakdown away from calling calling you incessantly
Because nobody in this fuckin world would answer anyway
Your facial piercing makes me angry
When I think of what you thought
Would be the appropriate way to drop me like twelve hot and scalding rocks

And you never cared to tell me what was wrong
Passive aggressive tendencies keep you from doing such
And I won’t say that I don’t want to hear from you ever again
Because 3AM is when you don’t say very much

What am I to you? Just a plan B when they leave you behind?
Am I your backup plan so you can feel secure and fine?
When you left me panicking in my car that winter’s day
I realized I didn’t want to live that way

And I can’t ever count on you, so stop making plans with me
Because your excuses and explanations are transparent for all to see

I’m clearing my calendar just to see you
And when you never text back I don’t know what else to do

And you never cared to tell me what was wrong
Passive aggressive tendencies keep you from doing such
And I won’t say that I don’t ever want to hear from you again
Because 3AM is when you don’t say very much
Track Name: Heroin For Your Soul
So im a fucking burden
What else is fucking new?
You’re emotionally abusive
Did you really think this through
I’m not what you want
I’m not like the first
To you I’m the antichrist
Aren’t I the fucking worst?
Get it through your head
That I’m my own person
Forcing your own standards
Only makes my issues worsen
It’s never been about me
It’s always been about you
Gain some perspective
Nothing you know is true
Track Name: Nick Is Dead, Do Not Cry For Him Children
Fuck this body
I hate this fragile mind
No love in my life
The grass is brown on every fucking side

Weak constitution
Shitty way of thinking
A waste of empty space at best
I’m in a pit and very quickly sinking

Where ever did this endless loop start?
I’ve torn out my purpose from a weak and bleeding heart

I guess I’ll OD tonight
It’s the only thing in my life that feels right

Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy
Nothing in this world will ever make me happy

when will it end
not very soon i guess
where does this end
I'm tired of talking about this mess
i call my life

I've written this exact song a thousand different times
ill stop when i finally feel fine
again
goodbye
Track Name: Footnote
You said not to waste a song on you
Damage control won’t work here
It’s less sadness and depression
And more pity and confusion
And I pity the man who falls into
A summer suburban romance

I was dead inside before you came
So now that state will always stay the same

You’re like a drug
But not one that I enjoy
anymore
Opiated in nature
You drain the life from every boy
I hope they overdose
They don’t wanna be saved
Cuz it doesn’t have to be this way
But they don’t listen to a single word I say

Go mess up something that doesn’t involve me or you
It’s funny cuz there’s nothing that you actually do
Prove to me that the air you breathe
Wasn’t better served by the leaves of a tree
You piece of phony, redundant, useless, lying, stupid shit

You succubus!

I was dead inside before you came
So now that state will always stay the same
Track Name: I Forgive You, This Is Over Now
Even though we’re no longer friends
I won’t need this in the end

I never want to write songs about any of you again

Im numb, I’m dumb, and this is no longer fun
So I don’t want to be bitter at all
All I can do is let you go

I don’t want abuse anymore
No matter what the use was for
But I can’t keep on looking back
On what made me so unhappy

I forgive Blue, Red, and Green
Please note that I don’t mean
To impose a friendship
I just only see it fit
To try new things
Although the hurt still stings
I no longer want to walk on hot coals
And wonder why my feet burn

And the people who make me feel the best make me feel like we’re the best of the worst
I don’t need to hold on to you
I’ll be in a better place soon
I’ve got tripkids, pit crews, and melancholy boys
All I can say is fuck this noise

I think I can finally forgive me

I'm numb, I’m dumb, and this is no longer fun
So I don’t want to be bitter at all
All I can do is let you go
Take your freedom and do what you see fit
All I ever brought myself was a world of shit anyway
Have fun, meet new pests
My soul, now can finally rest